Phony videogame claim rebuttal form

If you've ever come up against some idiot who's claimed the world record for some game despite it being abundantly obvious that he is incapable of doing so and has no proof, but found yourself stuck for what to say, then help is at hand. Use this ready-made response form!

Hi there! Your claims are extremely questionable! Here are some reasons why suspicion has fallen upon you.

( ) Your claim is a world record by a suspiciously large amount
( ) Your claim is a world record by a suspiciously tiny amount
( ) Your claim surpasses a very recent or high-profile world record
( ) Your claim is obviously impossible
( ) You used or attempted to use picture proof
( ) You doctored your video
( ) You claim not to have video proof
( ) ...despite knowing you were on course for a world record
( ) ...because your tape was erased/file was deleted
( ) ...because you don't have a VCR/capture card
( ) ...because your VCR/capture card's broken
( ) You claim to have video proof but refuse to supply it
( ) You've refused reveal your strategy
( ) ...but you keep going on about it
( ) Nobody else can get your strategy to work
( ) ...because it's clearly impossible, as you'd know if you'd tried
( ) Your strategy doesn't save enough time/gain enough points to account for the improvement you've claimed
( ) Your strategy is conveniently an unduplicable one-off glitch
( ) Your strategy conveniently only works one time in a thousand
( ) You claim you performed your feat without having any contact with the videogaming community
( ) ...but you use all the same tricks we do
( ) You claim X years of experience with this game
( ) ...and it hasn't been out that long
( ) Despite your claimed omniscience you appear to be ignorant of some basic facts about the game, of which any real experienced gamer would be fully aware
( ) That was your first post ever
( ) You're illiterate
( ) You're stupid
( ) You've lied before
( ) ...in the same post
( ) A lot of other people have made similar claims and turned out to be frauds

In conclusion,

( ) Display some credibility if you want to be taken seriously
( ) Come back with some evidence or not at all
( ) You'll be banned by the time you read this